AUTHOR: Nathaniel Vos


My thoughts have turned to what kind of career I might choose if I fail in university. As you might imagine, life at the University is very good at inspiring a parachute plan. I sometimes wonder if that is what it is best at doing. Surely thousands of students before me have despaired at midterms and final exams, worried about their future, hesitant about continuing with their studies. I know that after a few hours of organic chemistry and maybe the results of midterm, my dreams broaden to the glorious careers of counterwork at McDonald's, drainage systems technician, and small time scam artist. It is these thought, I think, that push me to continue with my studying. The thought of those, while very nice, somewhat "unfaltering" jobs somehow conjures up enough horror in my confused mind to push me into studying further. I think the dilemma is somewhat exacerbated by the scholastic institution I attend. As we are in the heart of cattle country, I have long suspected that the university takes its lessons from that industry too seriously. As a result, we now have what I affectionately label, "Meatgrinder U". Whose goal is to process what it considers a very fatty piece of meat into something that would be tasty to a vegetarian. Thus, even the best part of the meat only survives as ground round, mangled and dazed, and the rest is well... pushed off into the illustrious future of the proletariat. The downtrodden of the world. I have a solution for myself. Since the university is obviously no longer interested in the fat, I'll go to someplace that is! Where you might inquire, is that? Government. Yes, the one place that still values inefficiency and burgeoning bureaucracy. Perhaps I can become a mindless civil servant, pushing papers labeled "A" to the "B" pile. Sure, not exactly fascinating, but an easy slide into mediocrity. With the liberals at the helm, my job will never be threatened, my workload reduced by the year, and I will get a fat retirement to boot, at 35.
Seriously, I had a very long and lazy weekend. I accomplished precious little, save reorganizing my room a little. Tomorrow I have a midterm that I am desperate to pass, inorganic chemistry. While I think I am well prepared for it,I am not going to take any chances. Tomorrow I will be studying a great deal leading up to the exam. Pray for me, this one's important. (On the upside, I did rediscover the wonderful virtues of Garrison Keillor. His work is absolutely hilarious, and it is available in the archives of the web all the time. . Check that link out, it is well worth 20 minutes of your time to listen to the stories from Lake Wobegone) That's all for tonight. And may you join me again when my spirits are high, my bank balance low, and the music blaring in the background.